Wednesday, June 02, 2010

As The Phlegm Turns

Man, even the word is nasty - Phlegm. Spittum is no better. Lung cookie is a favorite but many people squint when I use it. Whatever you call it, I have it - in spades. No, really. Gardening spades full of it.

Let's see - fever, cough, exhaustion, sore throat, congestion, runny nose...add some buboes and it'd be the Dark Ages all over again. But do you know what makes this martyr specially martyristic? I kissed and waved at the Trooper as he left for a ride on his new bike with his pal. The world needs to know just how amazing I am. It could just be the fever talking at this point, though.

I tried to get some work done but found myself sending out meeting requests during times that no one was available. Suhweet. Step away from the Outlook. Instead, it has been a series of blow, hack, sip, hack, blow, keel over. I will have to deal with work later when I haven't more snark than sense.

I will tell you this, though - if that damned cat rings the bells on the door knob to go outside ONE MORE TIME I will put him in the tub. Smartass bastard. What kind of cat tells you when to open the door?

Right, then. Time to keel over, I think.

6 comments:

Keads said...

@Laura-

I am going to try and absolve myself of a less than helpful post in the past!

I have chronic allergies and congestion is par for the course. Might I recommend a Neti pot or the modern equivalent NeilMed sinus rinse? They provide some relief for me.

Kelly

Six said...

I hate being sick.
Doctor Six recommends 3 to 6 ounces of your favorite hot toddy mix. There is nothing a warmed up alcoholic beverage won't fix.
Get well soon Laura.

Joan of Argghh! said...

Lung Butter is the preferred term around my house. Bleargh!

Mend.

LauraB said...

LUNG BUTTAH!! My new fav!

Keads, I have an especially fancy pants nose hose. You can look up the "Grossan Hydro Pulse® System". A waterpik for the nose. Which is what I shall be about in a few hours.

That and maybe a nice toddy. I could stop on the way home for a lemon...

Keads said...

@LauraB- I bow with deference in the presence of your nose hose technology!

Seriously one is on the way, thanks for the tip!

The toddy is always a good idea!

Hope you feel better soon!

Kelly

LauraB said...

Hey, K! Glad I could lead you to a fine solution! Danged fine little machine they have.